Eulogy for Mae Weller
Mae Weller probably will never be famous beyond this circle who have gathered this morning to celebrate her life … but as we’ve all come to learn, even the most quiet life periodically explodes into a brilliance that touches dozens of lives. And, in doing so, changes hundreds of people for generations. Mae’s life has been one of those.
A valedictorian out of St. John’s in Scranton, Pa., Mae received scholarship offers she couldn’t afford to accept. Ironically, there were no additional monies for the other basics of college life … clothes, books, food. But for the next fifty years, she never gave up on education. Her life was a constant quest to be educated, to be learned. She read voraciously and became a highly self-educated woman.
One of Mae’s greatest triumphs was taking Cyril, Jr. to LeMoyne to register him in college. After registration, she went to the chapel and cried. She always wanted to begin a generation of educated people. Cy was just the beginning.
When Cyril, Sr. died, thirteen years and two days before Mae, Mae was forced to turn from a very successful life as the traditional wife and mother. Rather than giving into the luxury of helplessness and relying on her children for financial and emotional support, Mae asserted herself … built a new life … and showed a strength never seen in her before. She took a part-time job at a dry cleaner, managed well on a small income, and became a proud and independent person … the kind of person she most respected.
The Friday before she went into the hospital, Mae bought a new car. Although it was a Grand Am, Mae told her kids that it was a Trans Am. They had visions of Mae doing wheelies around Liverpool signaling yet another exciting phase in her life to come.
But that was not to be. When Mae entered the hospital, she said, “I know I’m dying. Don’t cry for me. I’ve lived a full life and I’ve produced a family of children who have produced families of children … I’ve always been ready to die.”
She felt she was going where she wanted to go … to what she called, “A glorious afterlife.” While these last few days have been a test of faith for those who loved her, her own faith was solid.
We’ve heard of Mae’s love of education and independence. But the most important part of her life was her children and grandchildren. The greatest compliment a child can pay a parent is to turn out all right. Cy and Joan are respected educators … Joyce and Paul are very successful business people … each is a fine parent with very good children. They have given to Mae all that she asked of them.
Mae never stopped behaving as if her children were still at home. She called to ask, “What are you wearing?” … ”What are you doing?” She baked for any and every occasion … for Joan’s classes, for schools, for soup kitchens. She took care of her children in her life and she will take care of them all their lives in the foundation that she has built.
She was in the front row at every play, concert and recital. She was their biggest fan, their greatest cheerleader. Family was, for Mae, her life.
Joan said, “If Mom could choose what is said today, it would not be that she was a great homemaker or that she paid her bills on time … it would be that she was a great mother.” She was the kind of Mom everyone should have … for a person who never held a high office, a high-powered job, she couldn’t have done a better job in the job that she created for herself.
I really only knew Mae through her children, Cy and Joan. They taught me a great deal about who Mae raised her children to be. In 1976, I was in a terrible automobile accident that succeeded in partially crippling me for three and a half years. You can imagine the emotional and financial devastation that could bring. Of all my friends, it was Joan and David who said to me, “If you need anything, you come to us.” While I made it through, the offer of support will stay with me forever.
And, in 1985, when my father died, the first person to come through the door of the funeral parlour was Cy Weller. He had driven in from Rochester to be there for me. What more do I need to know of Mae Weller!
The other day, Brooke said, “Grandma can’t die … she’s my best friend.” Well, Brooke, part of Grandma will live for a very long time. Look to your brothers and sister, your cousins, your aunt and your uncles. Look to your mother. Grandma is all around you.
When someone lives for nearly seven decades, how do you sum up that life in a few words. In Mae Weller’s case, it is very easy. In fact, we can do it in the fourteen words that she, herself, would choose: Cyril … Joan … Joyce … Paul … Allison … Adam … Ryan … Shana … Jake … Brooke …
Dawn … Lynn … Kelly … Brian. Mae, you lived a first-class life … You leave us with a first-class legacy.
